The invisible

veil of seethe to get through ... the latest in what is deemed ... the too slow process in move will not be prominent to the blind institution that are in a world elsewhere ...

The enjoy of post apocalyptic programmes not too far from the truth in a world that was and still is distant to everyone in my circles ...

The inner fester

articulate in this particular time in recovering from I hope only mischief to myself in the form of those pesky bugs that sometimes lay us low ...

The phrases and sentences through the fog of strong Meds ... the way forward in dealing with the inadequacy of a system that just does not work entirely for spectrums of society .... The process and progress outwardly to the inner... 

And how to deal with the haunts and taunts from a time in no less than just turning the other way ... the sands of time in how certain professionals dealt with what to anyone was an over whelming situation ... A hubby left in tears, pain and worst of all no one believed he was dying ...

 those that later said it was less stressing for him to be at home .... What Home .... where was home ? It was a store house ... 

... on the other hand so many whys ... from an Autumn to a Winter and how what and never! 

Medication these Mornings

in week past to keep the stomach well with those strong pain relief Meds ... a little movie magic to absorb me for a time from the prickle in the side. The intense to dull while it mends where it never rests ... 

A week where the final piece of a very long process made a success all round ... now for getting into s pattern to move further along with routines ... 

The barriers in

standing ground with the stresses of others in the work place .... Those of us that take the flak of those who do not turn up for valuable appointment times ... The requirements to see a medical personnel ... today not hanging on the phone in persuasion... I had to get there face to face .... the trauma still from ghosts past ... 

Then the sell in the chemist that I already deal with electronically... only today I had the script from the Doc themselves ... my tone in voice of my exasperation today... politely ... in answering to ... is this my regular chemist and ... do I know it can be done electronically.... ! Yes....sssss and yes... ssss !!!! 

It was others to point out much in the last weeks. I do not always think of the simplest solution... the latest in my pain relief my sister suggesting a remedy. Thankfully I was with others at the time, my daughter's beau went and got the supplies for me ... though it was not enough ... needing stronger stuff not over the counter ... 

Easier to ask

than seek ... the story of life now irritant after time in mountains of non required stuff.  I know what I will be doing in the fling .... and it is not for discussion.... 

I require how I need now ... and it is going to get down and done.. 

The one agreement that it is not good for my morale here 

A new vantage point

in life and death beyond the palour of infected skin with now lashes or brow. The time of the out in ... the time on from mud sticking and the gutter splashes ...

The poo where pennies were, The muck skinging ... the eviction notices deliberate on a birthday ... the ground hog day of a few seasons hate ...

A little bit more

of a revise on what is to be ... but first some rest to see off this irksome bug ... my mum advice on much ...the best medicinal on those that go before and know what is to come ... only my Bmi much different to what my family is ... I am odd out on that score ... the reverse process needs a patience more ... otherwise the reinforced boat will sink if I want to get back to rowing etc ... 

A Saturday

satisfying, although I am not ready to be tied to anyone let alone a hamster ... the very recent shared conversation with my recently acquired grandparent of a cousin reminiscing of our own paternal granny who'd crochet and knitted for all twenty plus of us ... 

She has taken to baking and knitting for her new found generational time of grand parenting and joked I'd be more than pet sitting myself one day!!! 

Tranquil in peace

and recuperate .... the ardous time to get to the tranquility... and back again ... the stuttering emotions never far ... a lot in change to original .. the usual attempt at plans though go with the flow of what comes this way ... 

I am really missing my late Dad from seeing his family ... The surviving brother a spitting image ... the brother whose life we celebrated only this week, looked so like his Dad ...  it naturally stirred up much ... 

I have not had the time like so many when many things happen in a short space of time in where, what and whom have suddenly disappeared over this space ... March is a month my late mother law remembered annually, on alternate days of when her mum and dad died on two days following, but very different years ... she was 26 when she saw her Dad die suddenly. 

She herself was to pass away one March from a sudden problem in which there was no hope to recover from... 

Now we are enjoying some space in our respective lives doing many different experiences we can take for granted when it is no longer there  ... a granddaughter having a rare holiday, holiday more often ... nothing new in that, only when you know her back story, how precious this is ... to go and experience life beyond what we had a while ... 

A beautiful Monday

March funeral ... the ritual now familiar of late ... A celebration personal of a life known here and in Canada ... the Presbyterian from across the pond to the later years at the local Baptist areas ... The diverse life of a Uncle ... 

The maple, anchor, and a rose the symbols on all the paraphernalia ... The wake bar the main cortège for everyone before the service. The thought to the family and friends coming together from all corners ... 

A Saturday different

Another town, another time in a unique non chain coffee shop. It was lively being a Saturday. 

I am still at odds with the world in how we spend out on a coffee in an environment noisy, not private and never enough space at peak times. 

Let alone any other times, cramming in customers for maximum effect... 

No palm tree sprinkles here ! This occasion not in a city, by the coast, or in my local. 

A hop, skip and a jump from a daughter's home ... in a town centre where accents of the region are strong! 

Too remote

from life though pleased with the speed of tube and train to see a daughter again ... and to meet a dwarf hamster for the first time  .... 

And yes that smell of the hutch is what I said my mother in laws smelt like ... all that time ago seeing it layered with a carpet of newspaper...

...it smelt like a rabbit hutch with just the air of urine ... 

Just something simple as peeking in to meet ... how life is tainted with times that cannot be erased ... 

The haphazard

way of today ... the bumps and humps of last minutes in the preparation process to spend time elsewhere awhile. 

A walk out in the air of a town to print off the tickets to board the trains ... and the forgotten or needs of ills ... 

And the thoughts will never be far from here when afar ...