End days of another January

certainly a sparkly month in moments this time since One Dreary December Day when I became one again ... a time that is getting one step nearer of being back in a small market town to reside my later years hopefully to come. 

I hope that once that settles into a new life style pattern ... I will be more settled ... 

In the meantime taking the scenic route to this destination and enjoying what is left now. I am working through a once vibrant home that became a bleak tunnel of store rooms and restoring it back for one ... wow all that space is mine now ... once I make it fully habitable again 

It will be another first

with February approaching for those who say the first without those who pass on before you, are the most difficult. Each year that passes is a first ... it is another unique anniversary never repeated ... This year is yet another momentous one ... A leap year ... a rare celebration of our engagement, one leap year past.

You adapt instead. I still celebrate. I have celebrated already this year, the private times one shares in an intimate relationship. Those moments, this time many years ago when I was due to give birth to our child. Those memories I only have now. The midwife who stayed after being off duty, that I had a rapport with. A male midwife in attendance on the ward when I was first in labour. The emergency C Section, with hubby wondering why he had to wear boots, when he too got prepped, to be at my side for the birth. It soon became apparent!

Despite our distress at the op ... the fact of being able to see hubby's delight, who was peering over the screen to see our baby arrive into the world  ... remains with me ... a once shared moment ... gone for now ...